Fate

I don't typically blog about my love life, or recent lack there of, however... One of the reasons I was pretty pumped to move to my beloved south has something to do with how I feel about southern gentlemen. That being said, I have a neighbor who is totally southern - Friendly, polite, dresses like a southerner, the whole nine yards. Sounds perfect, right?

It probably could be. Except that EVERY time I see him, I look ridiculous or do something embarrassing. A huge perk at the new gig is that on most days, we can dress casually. As you all know, any time I don't have to wear make-up, straighten my hair, or dress up, I definitely take full advantage. Therefore, 90% of the time I leave in the morning and come home at night, I'm wearing jeans, a t-shirt & a cardigan, no make-up and a pony tail. Inevitably, those are also always the days I see Mr. Happy Southern Boy.

Despite the fact that I rarely put myself together, I am even more of an embarrassment on weekend afternoons. Today, for example, I ventured out to grab some Subway for lunch wearing bright red Parkersburg High School sweat pants that I have cut into "capris", a THE Ohio State University (I know, repulsive. And I still have no idea why there is a THE involved) sweatshirt with a green shirt hanging out from under it, really cute strappy sandals and the Abby bun (all of my hair thrown up on the very top of my head.) Naturally, Mr. Happy Southern Boy was on his way out at the same time.

Two other gems that stand out to me (although, I've run into him looking like a fool many more times than that) include one morning that I was leaving for work, in my car, and he smiled his southern smile. My reaction? Total prom queen wave with matching enormous, exaggerated smile. Secondly, one night coming home from the gym (work out gear, still sweating...) I ran into him while carrying a Sam's Club sized box of tampons. Both mortifying.

So now, it's almost Saturday night. It's 80-some degrees out. I should probably pull myself together, plug in the straightener, and venture out. But, knowing me, I will do all that work just to learn he's out of town.

Milestones. What do they mean?

A friend of mine (who just became a mom for the first time) was sharing stories about different milestones her son has reached. Most of them were things I would expect - rolling over, holding his weight for a set amount of time, reacting to stories… the usual (Side note: I would still really love to learn how to spell the shortened version of usual). One that stood out to me was how excited she was about her 5 month old interacting with his toes. Prior to talking with her about its significance, I would have assumed that interaction would go unnoticed; it wouldn't stand out as a milestone.

Naturally, that led me to reflect on my own milestones. As every girl at 16 does, I had a very defined timeline filled with the obvious milestones. Graduate from high school, go to a great college, fall in love, get a degree, get married, find a job, have some kids, become "the boss" at a young age...

Hellooooo ten years later. While I have celebrated several of those "milestones," it is amazing how much my priorities have changed. What I define as a milestone now, I wouldn't have understood even six months ago.

I truly believe that there were subtle stepping stones (say that three times fast) along the way to help me define what is important, and what can wait. I graduated high school, I went to an amazing college, I fell in love, I earned a degree, I moved to a big city, and I started my first job. This is where I began to understand that change is a good thing, and I can decide what to consider a milestone for myself, and celebrate it however I want to.

I took a big chance at the end of last year, and packed up my life to move to a new city for a new job. I struggled for a couple of months in Raleigh both personally and professionally to establish a routine and a familiarity with totally new surroundings. It was actually pretty recently that I started to feel really good about… everything. And THAT is a huge milestone, in my book.

The relationship I have now with Dock, Dizz and Bub, as you know, is beyond incredible. Milestone. Feeling confident about myself as a professional. Milestone. Finally letting go of someone who loves to disappoint me. Milestone. Trusting myself in the decisions I am making. Milestone. Maintaining a budget. Milestone. (Huge milestone. Going from bartending cash in the pocket whenever I wanted to a paycheck took a while to get used to)

The list goes on.

This move sort of forced me to grow up. Not in a harsh manner, but in more of an accountability way. And with that, I have become hugely self aware of what is important and what is not. (Milestone)

I have no idea what will happen next. What I do know is that I am already excited for it.